• The cortisone injection in my left hip was completely ineffective.
• My right hip stamina and muscle strength seems to be back to what it was pre-surgery.
• I’m still unable to put on my right sock, though I am starting to be able to take off that sock.

First video: Vivaldi’s “Winter”.

I was originally planning this to be choreographed and involve veil work, but I underestimated how long that would take. This is an improvised dance, though I have danced to this song before.

My thoughts:

• First, it’s nice to see that I have improved since my last video… especially my undulations. Also nice to see that my right hip doesn’t noticeably move differently than my left.
• Things I need to work on: for performances, I need to turn more so the audience isn’t always seeing the same side of me; I need to smile more; my arm work needs to improve (fluidity can’t improve much more, but I need a better understanding of framing and how to use my arms more effectively).

Second video: “Cakkidi” belly dance-hip hop fusion

With this video, I was trying to incorporate some of the hip hop moves I’ve learned from working with Anasma’s “Liquid Fusion” DVD. Moves to watch for: 3D figure 8, arm “pops”, arm waving.

And just to compare, here’s a video I made back in February: Mariam Matossian’s “Partridge”.

To celebrate, I’ve made a decision:

By the end of November, I will make a belly dance video to Vivaldi’s “Winter”.

Why Vivaldi’s “Winter” and not something more traditional? First, because Vivaldi’s “Winter” speaks to my soul more than perhaps any other piece of music I’ve ever heard. Being able to belly dance to music that’s so meaningful to me is a really powerful experience. Second, because it’s a long song, so it will be more challenging to create a cohesive dance than it would be for the average Lebanese pop songs I otherwise dance to, which tend to be 3-5 minutes long. And third, because it has 3 distinct sections, which allow me to really vary the kind of dancing I’m doing.

In other recovery news, I am still unable to bend down enough to put on my right sock. I can, however, now bend down enough to take off my right sock, which is an improvement. I admit to being a little disappointed that it’s taking so long for me to recover my ability to bend all the way, but at least it’s not having a significant impact on my daily life (thanks to my wonderful husband, who’s become a pro at putting on my socks!).

I am also still having constant pain in my right hip, though this pain is at a tolerable level and significantly less than before the surgery.

About my left hip, I am skeptical that the cortisone injection did anything. If it did, I’ve yet to be able to notice. I’m still optimistic that I won’t need that surgery until February at the earliest and probably not until June 2012.

The truth is that the progress I’ve been making since my last post hasn”t been quite as noticeable as the progress I was making in, say, the first couple of weeks after the surgery. There has been progress, but it’s been more of the “slow and steady” variety than the “leaps and bounds” kind.

In any case, here are some of the noticeable signs of progress over the last few weeks:

• I can, as of mid-last week (9.5 weeks post-op), sleep on my right side;
• I’m able to belly dance for about 13 minutes (including 5 minutes warm-up);
• I’m able to walk as much as needed without pain in my right hip (though not without pain in my left);
• Step over the ledge into our bathtub with minimal assistance.

What I’m still not able to do:

• Bend down enough to put on my right sock;
• Kneel on the ground for more than a brief period (though this is an activity I’d be limited in anyways because of my left knee and hip).

Next Tuesday, I’m getting a cortisone injection in my left hip joint, to try to alleviate that pain. If it’s successful, I may be able to put off that surgery for 6 months to a year longer, which would give me more time to break in my new hip and recover my stamina and muscle strength.

My stamina and muscle strength are definitely improving, but it’s taking time. I’m really getting excited to see what my right hip will be like when it’s fully recovered. I’m finally starting to be able to really use it, and I’m enjoying it.

Tomorrow, I will return to belly dancing in the main room, which has a nice oriental carpet (compared to the hard bamboo flooring in the bedroom, where I’ve been dancing this week) and a better sound system. I don’t feel confident enough yet to return to working with DVDs, but I’m hopeful that my right hip will loosen up enough in the next few weeks to return to working with DVDs (I’m more likely to push myself and over-do when I’m working with a DVD). In the meantime, I will continue dancing to music.

Even though I was exhausted when I arrived home Tuesday, I couldn’t help trying out belly dancing… real belly dancing, with music! Here is what I jotted down immediately after:

My muscle memory is still good; it seems I don’t really have to relearn how to do anything. My right hip is very tight in the front, which does affect how well I can maintain proper posture, and I feel a bit unsteady putting my weight on my right leg, as when doing left hip lifts and drops.

But overall: muscle memory is still there, my right hip definitely HASN’T lost any range of motion (the stiffness in front aside), all I lack now is muscle strength and aerobic stamina.

And those will come back with time.

I am still hopeful my ability to belly dance will completely return, but I have to admit that it’s frustrating to be only able to dance for 10 minutes or less. It feels like I’m just starting to get into it when I have to stop. My shimmies are nowhere near as powerful as they used to be. Both legs–not just my right–are weak. My right hip is very tight in the front from scar tissue and muscles that haven’t been adequately stretched for weeks; this results in my right hip being higher than my left when both feet are flat on the ground and I begin to enter belly dance posture. Happily, I’m able to correct this when I see it, but I will need to continue dancing in front of a mirror for a while until this correction happens automatically.

As far as specific moves go, I seem able to do everything I was able to do prior to the surgery, though not quite as fluidly. Moves that seem especially beneficial for me to do right now, in that they give me a nice stretch in the front of my right hip, are: outward vertical figure 8s, horizontal small & big hip circles (the “butt swipe” kind), omi’s, and pelvic lifts and drops.

One concern I do have that’s not directly related to my surgery is that my left knee seems to begin hurting faster than it used to. I’m attributing this to muscle weakness, in that since my muscles aren’t as strong as they once were, my knees aren’t being as supported as they’re used to. I’m hoping this will improve with time and practice. In the meantime, I’m stopping belly dancing as soon as my knees start hurting.

I’m hoping to post a video of me belly dancing sometime soon, so you can see how my right hip is moving at this point in my recovery, and so I’ll have a visual reminder of how my hip is right now. I’ve been pondering doing 2 choreographed dances when I’m fully recovered and my muscle strength and stamina have returned. The 2 songs I’m considering dancing to are “Winter” by Vivaldi and “Hizzi Dalli Hizzi [Move and Continue to Move]” by Emad Sayyeh.

While doing my belly dancing drills just a few minutes ago, I recalled that odd sense of having done vertical figure 8s in bed this morning. I decided to take a chance and see what doing a vertical hip figure 8 with both feet flat on the floor would feel like.

It wasn’t a dream. I really did do vertical hip figure 8s while in bed this morning. How do I know this? Because I can do them while standing now.

I cried out of sheer joy.

I’ve been doing that a lot recently when trying a belly dance move for the first time after surgery. It’s just such a powerful experience for me to see my hips moving like this again.

But because I didn’t specifically ask my surgeon about vertical hip figure 8s… and because my right hip is a little more uncomfortable now than it normally is (though that could have been the 10 omi’s–both directions–I tried, too )… I’m going to be only doing vertical hip figure 8s a couple of times a week for the next week or so. (As for those omi’s I slipped in, I think I’ll be limiting those to a couple of times a week as well.)

My first post-op appointment with the surgeon went well. He told me I could walk without using the walker in the house, but should still use it when walking outside or for any extended periods of walking. Since then, I’ve been walking fine without any support devices inside the house and have been using a walking stick for brief excursions outside. I’m now able to walk about 300 feet at a time without too much difficulty, though I am still noticeably limping–but I’m actually limping less now than I was before the surgery, so I am very pleased!

But the big news–and the news that you all are really interested in–was that he said it would perfectly safe for me to start working on hip lifts, hip drops, hip slides, and pelvic lifts and drops.

The day after the appointment, last Wednesday, I attempted my first belly dancing moves since the surgery.

It is difficult for me to explain the absolute euphoria I felt as I performed my first hip lifts and drops in over two months. Real ones, not while seated, but while standing. What shocked me most was how very close to natural the movements felt: there was some stiffness with hip drops, but the movement was much more fluid than I expected. And hip lifts were downright easy. I expected the movements to feel jerky and unnatural, like the way my left wrist felt shortly after I had it replaced (and the way it still feels today, though I’ve gotten used to it by now). I expected the movements to be difficult.

And for my un-operated side, they were. Putting most of my weight on my right hip to do hip lifts and drops on my left side is a challenge. To do these, I have to hold on to something to support my right hip. This confirms a suspicion I’ve had for a while: that the “passive” hip is absolutely essential to the movement of the “active” hip in belly dancing. In other words, the fact that my right hip was in such bad shape made doing movements with my left hip harder than doing movements with my right hip. Because the “passive” hip is the one bearing the weight as the “active” hip is noticeably moving, the “active” hip can only move as much as the weight-bearing “passive” hip can support.

So in addition to the standard PT exercises, I’m doing the following belly dance drills daily:

• 5 hip lifts right, 5 hip drops right;
• 5 hip lifts left, 5 hip drops left;
• 10 pelvic lifts;
• 10 hip slides

And it’s wonderful. I feel very confident that I’ll be able to return to belly dancing once I’m fully recovered. And that is such a huge relief to me… because even though the surgeon claimed I’d be able to belly dance again after the surgery, I didn’t let myself fully believe him. The cost was too high. If I expected to be able to return to belly dancing and was unable to, the disappointment would have been devastating.

But now I know: I will be belly dancing again.

In non-belly dancing news, I’ve been having pretty severe lower-back pain when I try to sleep at night. This is because I’m unable to sleep on either side (the surgeon has said it’s safe for me to sleep on my sides with a pillow between my knees, but the pain in my new hip increases dramatically whenever I attempt to do so), which means I lie on my back all night long, barely moving. I’ve been putting one and then two pillows under my knees in a mostly-vain attempt at relieving the pain in my lower back. What ends up happening, though, is that after 3-4 hours, my lower-back locks up and jolts me awake with a rather ridiculous amount of pain. I then have to get myself out of bed while looking like a turtle knocked on its back and stretch for at least half an hour–enough time for the pain-killer to kick in–before returning back to bed.

Luckily, though, I already had experience doing back stretches from belly dancing! Jenna, in one of her belly dance instructional DVDs (I believe it’s in the warm-up for “Heartbeat of Bellydance”, but I’m not certain), has a fantastic back stretch included in the warm-up. That stretch and pelvic lifts have been incredibly helpful at easing my lower-back pain. Also, walking while maintaining a pelvic tilt/lift has been helpful at reducing the lower-back pain I get while sleeping. And I’ve heard from friends who’ve had this surgery that I should be able to sleep on my non-operated side after about 4 weeks, so I hopefully will only have another week of waking up every 3-4 hours, having to get out of bed for at least half an hour, and then attempting to sleep only to have the cycle repeat itself until I give up and get out of bed for the day.

Overall, I’m doing well, if tired.

As for belly dancing, I’m waiting until I see the surgeon for my first post-op appointment this Tuesday. I don’t expect I’ll be able to really dance for a while, but I’d like to start drilling hip lifts, hip drops, pelvic lifts and drops, and hip slides. My goal is to do these moves as small as possible and then slowly increase the movement until it’s back to normal; but I want to be sure that attempting these movements is safe at this time and won’t, say, dislocate my new hip.

I am very grateful that I was able to belly dance for so long before the surgery. The muscles I was able to develop–my abs, quads, glutes, etc.–have been very helpful during this recovery period. I’m frankly not sure how I would have managed getting through this if I hadn’t belly danced for so long. I’m more aware of my body because of belly dancing. I’m more aware of how it moves and when a movement is about to cause pain.

And I am very optimistic that I’ll be able to return to belly dancing sometime soon.

I’m ready. More than ready.